Kim Tocker,  —

I’m 49 and live in Christchurch, New Zealand. I was diagnosed with Limited Systemic Scleroderma in 2013, and the disease has slowly progressed over the past three years. Prior to my diagnosis, I worked as a Counsellor/Therapist in private practice, however I was forced to close my practice in 2014 because the fatigue associated with the disease had become profound. Well before I studied, trained and worked as a Counsellor many years ago (at least 20) I was employed as a Dental Assistant. It is my belief that whilst working in this capacity I handled a number of chemicals that are now considered dangerous and this exposure may have been the trigger for my disease, together with an already existing genetic component. These days, my full time job is to work hard at my self-care and manage my symptoms as best I can. Part of this management is to reflect on and write about my experiences about living with Scleroderma in ordinary day to day life. This helps me a great deal, and I hope it helps my readers, both those who also suffer with Scleroderma, and to help raise awareness in those who do not. I enjoy adding a little humour to my writing, because honestly, I feel it’s important we all have a wee laugh from time to time. However, my writing usually includes a serious reflection of some sort. On a personal note, I am the wife of one, and the Mother of three boys. My husband Max is my main caregiver, and I am very fortunate to have such a loving and giving spouse. My children are aged 21, 19 and 13, and our two oldest boys live in different parts of New Zealand to study and work. Our youngest will be starting High School in 2017. We live with a menagerie of animals, including two dogs and four cats.

Articles by Kim Tocker

It’s a Simple Life with Scleroderma and Me

Life certainly is complicated, isn’t it? Over countless cups of tea with friends, I get to hear all about tricky mega-deals tangling big corporations, complex staffing issues, and legal wrangles with contracts. My friends have full and intricate working days and deal with perplexing problems at the…

Scleroderma Penetrates My Dreams

Since childhood, I have had a wonderful reoccurring dream in which I fly around a town on a magic carpet. The carpet arrives and hovers around knee height, waiting for me to climb aboard. I get on, lie on my stomach, and hold the edges while…

I’m Learning to Stand Scleroderma Strong

I want to write about a strange little topic today that some may find uncomfortable to read. I am sure it is a theme that those without a serious disease also can identify with, but I think that being chronically unwell can magnify the entire matter.

Can Sacred Places Be Healing Spaces?

I notice that something happens whenever I feel unwell and overwhelmed by my disease and the life challenges it brings. During these times, I get the overwhelming urge to run away. There is a particular place to which I escape. Spending some time there…

When It Is OK to Say, ‘I Can’t’

There is a phrase that gets me going every time it is offered up to me. It drives me nuts. It usually happens when I am trying to explain why I cannot do something that entails using a part of my body that scleroderma has permanently…

Coping with My Scleroderma Soul Fatigue

Not so many years ago, around the time of my diagnosis, I recall having a major hissy fit. I had been invited to a wedding, and I didn’t like how I looked that day. My hair wasn’t right, and I just didn’t like the way my…